Manic Monday

There was a song back in the day called Manic Monday that was sung by a group called the Bangles. The song sucked to be honest but was very popular because everyone could relate to it. It was about dreading Monday because the work week starts and it is back to reality. I myself hate Sundays (today is Sunday by the way) because that is when the big buy in poker tournaments are. You can have a great week and have it ruined by a mediocre Sunday which happens more often than not. I have been struggling to say the least for the last few months and with recently losing my backer due to him going busto was forced to agree to a small time backer who is a bankroll nit. I have never played for anyone who is so nitty and though part of me is thankful, a part of me is annoyed when I want to play a certain tourney and cannot.
I had a very successful last week at low stakes, cashing for around 15k for which 9 of that is profit and I get half of that. It is a week that I desperately needed but I am not even close to satisfied with. I have set some goals for myself that I am staying up at all times of the night trying to accomplish. The immediate goal is to make another 7k by Wednesday night so I can go to Oregon for a live tournament. I love everything about Oregon (except for that replay official who screwed OU fans by cheating and he can go ahead and die of aids!). The people are friendly, the golf is cheap, the women are easy, and the poker players suck. I mean seriously , what more can I ask for? The next goal on the list is to get this to 50k by May 28 so that I have $25k for the Venetian tournaments to play on my own. I am sick of playing for other people and it feels impossible to get out of debt playing for others. You lose, you lose, you lose, and then you win and you don't even have enough to be out of makeup, much less repay people you owe funds to but I can promise you that all they see is that you won money and that's all that matters to them. It is a vicious cycle to say the least which is why I want to start playing for myself. I think a good start is to start taking Sundays off until I find a big time backer or maybe until I am not so worried about the end result and just play which is harder said than done at times.
I hope the next time that I write I am in a place called Pendleton. And 36 hrs from now I start my 90 day training session to try to not look so fat on my 40th birthday which I can't even say w/o feeling nauseas. I don't feel 40 but that isn't gonna stop me from being it. I think that deserves a FML