Therapy?

I've been told by a hell of a writer that writing is theraputic but is it? Writing down your feelings for the world to see is kinda scary, especially when you are totally in disarray and unhappy with your life.
I can't remember what movie or show it was from but throughout it someone would hold up the finger 1 and at the end all it referred to was the 1 thing that makes you happy. For me that is easy, it's my kids and nothing else comes close. Whenever I take a ridiculous beat or I am worried about bills or anything , that is what I think about and I feel better.
Lately I have been miserable because of work and it absolutely pisses me off when someone tells me to just quit poker. Poker isn't the problem, doing poorly at it is. While poker is different from most jobs, it is the same with every male friend I have in that until you can't be happy in life until you are happy in your career. I can only imagine that a car salesman who can't sell a car would hate his job, a restaurateur with no customers the same, and so forth and so on.
For now I have 2 goals in life. First and foremost to find a backer for poker and in the meanwhile look for a job I can enjoy and secondly to drop a ton of weight. I have not been eating well or exercising for quite some time and I am giving up soda for the next 90 days which will be excruciating on me so forgive me if my coherence level dips after this entry. Maybe my health is hurting me in my poker but since I am hardly playing it is hard to tell.

Til next time